Saturday, October 8, 2011

I Wish I Was a Superhero

The title says it all.  It would probably be okay if I just posted the title and went on with my day, but I feel the need to fill up some space with some colorful commentary. 

Superheroes.  They aren't among us (as far as I know), but we certainly have a growing number of actors flying around these days.  I blame my recent obsessions with superheroes directly to the release of many superhero films in the last decade.  Even though only about half of those movies were actually good, my imagination has started to take hold of these ideas and have given me some entertaining day dreams...

I have a cape and a mask, now all I need is some superpowers!  I realize that the thought of me with superpowers might frighten most of you, but the truth is that it frightens me as well.  I'd like to think that if I gained abilities (ohhh... like the ability to blow things up...) beyond that of normal human beings, I would end up as one of those villains that had a good goal but took the wrong path to achieve it.

At the end of the day, I don't really care what sort of powers I received, just as long as they weren't super lame.  What I really care about is having a THEME SONG!!!  Take Superman for example; most of you might associate superman with the march that John Williams composed?  Maybe some of you even remember the theme for Batman from the Tim Burton movies.  These themes were memorable and singable by those who can sing.

BUT (and I am still uncertain if it is bad to start a sentance with "but", because I have heard arguments go either way) this brings me to the real problem in the world.  There is a new breed of super villain, one that seeks to blandify and lametize the existence of superheroes... BORING FILM SCORE COMPOSERS!!!

Can you sing for me the theme for Thor?  Captain America (not counting the ridiculous one that those dancing girls sang after he punched Hitler a ridiculous amount of times, even though i will admit that it was catchy)?  How about the Hulk?  I know at some point I heard some four note motive in the Green Lantern movie, but I most likely forgot it before the end of the movie.  Unfortunately, it seems that most movie soundtracks are beginning to sound the same these days.  This is evil in musical form.

I'm still crossing my fingers for some real good themes in the Avengers movie next summer, but so far the music hasn't greatly impressed me.  Don't get me wrong, it hasn't been terrible music, just pure evil blandness.  They literally threw some notes in the blander until they created a blandshake of blandic porportions.  How bland.  it's like using the same blandesean word over and over again in a blandourous fashion (and in some instances inventing new forms of the word; see "blandify").

Frustration.  I will do my best to fight these villains of sound by refusing to listen to the soundtrack of these films unless accompanied by the movies which have been getting better over the years.  Those composers will get no income from me if i can help it!

Until next time!  Go mug a mugger for America.


  1. I would have to agree with you mostly.... The film score world is running out of Williamses and Elfmans. Just to play devil's advocate, though, I do have the Captain America theme ready to recall at a moment's notice.... :) haha. I think one of the issues is the choice of composer for these superhero flicks. I mean.... Who would've thought of Alan Silvestri (Cap'n A) for a superhero movie??

  2. And even then, can anyone really cite an Elfman melody? I adore his music in its beautiful ambiguity, but leave that for him to do. And don't forget to give the orchestrators their fair share of the credit. For every film composer there are probably at least 4 or 5 others putting in the colors that we hear.

  3. I can hum the Thor theme. But it took three viewings of the movie to do it.. . Umm . . . I really only go to see these movies for the music . . . ;)